A friend posted a link to this site on Facebook today and I’ve been exploring while the monkeys are in their cages.

Aside from the bump in the highway that made me revert back to my “maiden” name, I’ve always considered myself to be more humanist than feminist. This is especially true now that I am raising two small manfriends. Peoples is peoples, my idealist little heart sings, and if gender isn’t an issue for me, why is it such a big deal to everyone else?

Lately though, I realize that I have been desensitized to a lot of crap due to the company I keep. And now that I have daughter, said crap is starting to stink again.

About-face.org focuses on the negative depiction of women in the media. The “offenders” they choose to dissect put out messages that are often overtly demeaning or just plain wrong, but still these ads make their way into our magazines, onto our TVs and computers and most days we fail to give them a second look. But the messages are there, marinating our subconscious so that we know thinner is better and that it’s hilarious for men to be rollicking misogynists.

Case in point:

This ad appeared in Maxim earlier this year. Talk about catering to your target audience, but come on! Nobody thought the term “skank” was a bit much? What about the poor soul in the fish nets? How’s she going to spray away the gonorrhea and spritz on some self-respect? Is there an ad for that in Cosmo?

It’s supposed to be funny. I get it.

If it is, as so many things are, “all in good fun”, is it really no big deal? I have learned to laugh off everything from off-the-cuff remarks to full-on, Talledega Nights style,  outright sexist ambushes from friends, family and complete strangers. I smile, I chuckle where I am supposed to or I look appropriately distressed for just the right amount of time to trick my conscience into thinking I am doing the right thing and then I nervously laugh alongside the rest of the normal, everyday people. But do I really want my kids to do this too?

There is something to be said for having a sense of humour and not being the uptight downer all of the time, but why does having a sense of humour have to entail enduring the propagation of norms that shouldn’t be norms?

I don’t want my sons to be misogynistic, heavy drinking, jerks who value women only as non-entities, their sole purpose in life only to fulfill the needs of men. I don’t want my sons to think those qualities are amusing or even the slightest bit okay. I come back to my eloquent statement at the start of this tirade: peoples is peoples. That’s what I want all my children to remember: everybody feels, hurts, elates and loves.

But what does any of this have to do with VeganMoFo, you ask?

Check out this little gem:

About-face.org contributor Sabrina Sierra cites

the most disturbing part of the commercial is when the off-screen narrator announces that the teriyaki burger is “more than just a piece of meat”—implying that Audrina, a woman, is just a piece of meat

But couldn’t he just as easily be drawing a correlation between Madame Bikini and the burger,  implying that Audrina, complex woman that she is, is also more than “just a piece of meat”? I mean, she eats crap and cares about her body-so many layers, so many complicated, complicated layers.

I know, I know. Not likely and not good enough.

To me, the most disturbing part of the ad is when she states

“To look this hot in a bikini, I got to give up, like, everything.”

So many issues! Where to begin?

On the one hand, it’s pretty damn honest. You can’t go around stuffing your face with the greasy flesh of tortured dead animals and other processed “foods” and expect not to eventually look like a character straight out of Wall-E. So we’re supposed to believe that she gives up the lion’s share of junk, but sneaks in this one, er, treat. Everything in moderation, right?

And while we’re still on this hand, let’s look at the woman. She really isn’t AS emaciated as some of the role models we are supposed to aspire to. She’s got curves, no bones are protruding anywhere. I believe this girl fuels her party machine on a regular basis, though I seriously doubt it’s at Carl’s Jr. I am sure she is at the bottom end of the spectrum of what is considered to be a healthy weight. So, is telling people they can still be healthy and enjoy and occasional indulgence really so wrong?

Here comes that other hand.

“More than just a piece of meat.” Whereas, by a huge leap of the imagination that I am sure only I will take, I can almost skew this statement enough to make in empowering to women (look past my gold bikini and into my thoughts and travails), when it come to animals, there is no way to make it anything more than what it is: an accurate summation of how this society views other species. Animals are exploited their entire lives until finally all that is left are some valueless pieces of flesh.

So, let’s empower women by empowering animals. Human-beings are not supposed to eat the processed, horrible garbage that poor Audrina has to deprive herself of anyway. If people primarily ate the wonderful whole foods that occur naturally in, you guessed it, NATURE, we would all be the shape we are naturally supposed to be, and I bet it would look closer to Audrina than Kirstie Alley (I’m sorry, Kirstie. Now put down the popcorn chicken).

I love my daughter with every cell in my being and I don’t want her to starve herself so she can look like some impossible ideal. Nor do I want her to compromise her health by embracing the flip-side of that coin and eating whatever chemically over-processed crap might satisfy her flavour-hole because “why should she be deprived of anything”? It absolutely KILLS me when I see obese parents rearing obese kids and insisting that they are happy with how they are, big is beautiful and how dare we judge? Those parents aren’t even giving their kids a chance!

Our bodies need wholegrains, fresh veggies, lean protein. Our brains need healthy, natural oils. Our bodies do not need petroleum products, sugary soft drinks, the hormone and antibiotic soaked flesh of other living creatures. Is it really so hard to offer an apple in place of chocolate chip granola bar? Fruit juice in place of Kool-Aid? Grown-ups are in charge of buying the groceries: a kid will never have to give up “like everything” if they are never exposed to garbage like Carl’s Jr. in the first place. None of my children have ever eaten fast food.  Do they miss it? NO BECAUSE THEY’VE NEVER HAD IT! Fast food isn’t real food. My kids eat real food and they like real food. I am sure they would love the taste of some salty, beef tallow fries, too, but until they can make an educated decision for themselves, until they can weigh the pros and cons of ingesting that poison and make a real choice, I won’t put their bodies through that. I will feed my babies real people food, not mad-scientist, capitalist tripe.

whew.

So, I guess what I want to say is that I am giving my children the gift of a healthy start. Our humane diet leaves little chance that my baby girl (or either of my strapping lads, if they so choose) won’t look smoking hot in a gold bikini. But she will also have a strong heart, a complex mind and a kind soul to fill out that healthy rack.

(Special thanks to dirtyolive.net for the fodder!)